Doubt

Welcome to Good Friday. Are you suppose to say that with excitement?

It may surprise some of my friends, but there was a time in my life that I doubted my faith…to the point of considering leaving. I had so many questions, most of which only led to more questions, rather than answers.

At that point in my life, I felt very distant from God. I didn’t know how to continue following Jesus. The doubt was overwhelming.

Have you ever been there? Ever had doubts about God? It’s okay, I won’t tell anyone.

So what happened?

Well, there is an important step to leaving Jesus. Where are you going to go? To whom? To what?

If I was going to leave Jesus, I realized I would be going to someone or something else. One might say, “No, I’m just taking a break from all religion.” I considered that one also, until I realized I was just replacing myself with Jesus. It didn’t seem like a good option.

So I decided to stay, hanging by a string to my faith. I decided I would rather walk with Jesus and hope he might answer some of my questions along the way, than to go with someone or something else who also did not have all the answers to my questions.

I’m so glad I stayed with Jesus.

Yes, he has answered some of my questions along the way. No, not all of them, but many. The journey has been a good one.

As you do whatever you do this Easter season, may you experience Jesus. Not religion. Not control or obligation. Just Jesus. It is a relationship. Like all valuable relationships, it is…messy, beautiful, disorienting, intimate and costly.

Jesus loves you. May you experience his life-giving love.

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